What I find so interesting about this is how much your experience mirrors mine, but in slightly different ways. I started out as more of a libertarian ideologue and gradually moderated from there, and despite being a mostly Mediterranean creature, I was actually drawn to Buddhism for many of the same reasons you seem to have been to Stoicism. It certainly helped me through my own struggles with depression. Anyway, lots of good advice and valuable insight here. Thanks for writing it.
Many women still yearn for traditional gender roles which simply aren't available any longer. Many women's discontent about how those roles aren't available any longer or with the system at large have no meaningful expression (bc of the decrepitude of the system), and express as discontent with men, or doubling down on their self worth by joining a cadre of similarly discontented others. And of course women have always more easily connected with one another about emotional topics, so, x wave feminism is an amalgam of related issues and that largely have nothing to do with what they actually complain about, which often isn't actually even true.
Well, that's a can of worms based on a cursory skim of paragraph one. I think anthropology sheds the best light on it, psychology second, sociology only third. I'll say more when i see what response this preliminary comment gets.
My response to your response on Metaphysics is edited into the response above it, bc technology. I'm putting this here bc i don't think you'll be notified of that edit. I'm going to respond to this article shortly...
I love this beautiful story about adversity and overcoming. You taught me a lot about online leftism and digital communities around mental health issues. Your experiences have expanded my point of view, thank you for sharing.
Also, when it comes to eastern spirituality, stoicism, and anything from Cal Newport, you are speaking my language. Keep up the good work 🙏
Excellent piece! Don’t know if you’ve read Jordan Peterson - he’s been so helpful to young men who are so badly lost in our culture too. He’s all about discipline.
I love that you mention temperance and wonder if it isn't time to dust the term off. For the longest time it meant abstaining from alcohol but also moderation or self-restraint. There is such wisdom in Stoicism. I'm curious if generally speaking women can benefit from it more than men in modern culture. As a male social worker I see so many men flock to it on YouTube as a way to suppress their emotions and it rarely ends well for them. On the surface it overlaps nicely with what some call toxic masculinity and leads them down a rule bound path with less moderation. Its hard to explain to those guys that it takes discipline to endure painful feelings without complaint. It is actually more stoic for them to feel more deeply but not be led by the emotions.
This is so well written, and comprehensive—that I feel guilty reading it on my phone & have to focus it later on my laptop.
I’m trying to regain my attention span by avoiding X for Lent, but finding myself here on Substack more as a substitute. Distraction is easy to find in our modern age.
I was skimming bits of Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations last week and had to laugh at how he was chastising himself about succumbing to distractions. I was thinking, “what could possibly be distracting in an age before technology?” 😂
Thank you for this piece. I was invited to a small women’s group after church recently and despite my introvert brain resisting… I know developing in person relationships is more sustaining than staring at my phone & communicating from a distance, so I’ll try it out.
What I find so interesting about this is how much your experience mirrors mine, but in slightly different ways. I started out as more of a libertarian ideologue and gradually moderated from there, and despite being a mostly Mediterranean creature, I was actually drawn to Buddhism for many of the same reasons you seem to have been to Stoicism. It certainly helped me through my own struggles with depression. Anyway, lots of good advice and valuable insight here. Thanks for writing it.
re: gender identity
Many women still yearn for traditional gender roles which simply aren't available any longer. Many women's discontent about how those roles aren't available any longer or with the system at large have no meaningful expression (bc of the decrepitude of the system), and express as discontent with men, or doubling down on their self worth by joining a cadre of similarly discontented others. And of course women have always more easily connected with one another about emotional topics, so, x wave feminism is an amalgam of related issues and that largely have nothing to do with what they actually complain about, which often isn't actually even true.
Well, that's a can of worms based on a cursory skim of paragraph one. I think anthropology sheds the best light on it, psychology second, sociology only third. I'll say more when i see what response this preliminary comment gets.
My response to your response on Metaphysics is edited into the response above it, bc technology. I'm putting this here bc i don't think you'll be notified of that edit. I'm going to respond to this article shortly...
I love this beautiful story about adversity and overcoming. You taught me a lot about online leftism and digital communities around mental health issues. Your experiences have expanded my point of view, thank you for sharing.
Also, when it comes to eastern spirituality, stoicism, and anything from Cal Newport, you are speaking my language. Keep up the good work 🙏
Excellent piece! Don’t know if you’ve read Jordan Peterson - he’s been so helpful to young men who are so badly lost in our culture too. He’s all about discipline.
I love that you mention temperance and wonder if it isn't time to dust the term off. For the longest time it meant abstaining from alcohol but also moderation or self-restraint. There is such wisdom in Stoicism. I'm curious if generally speaking women can benefit from it more than men in modern culture. As a male social worker I see so many men flock to it on YouTube as a way to suppress their emotions and it rarely ends well for them. On the surface it overlaps nicely with what some call toxic masculinity and leads them down a rule bound path with less moderation. Its hard to explain to those guys that it takes discipline to endure painful feelings without complaint. It is actually more stoic for them to feel more deeply but not be led by the emotions.
This is so well written, and comprehensive—that I feel guilty reading it on my phone & have to focus it later on my laptop.
I’m trying to regain my attention span by avoiding X for Lent, but finding myself here on Substack more as a substitute. Distraction is easy to find in our modern age.
I was skimming bits of Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations last week and had to laugh at how he was chastising himself about succumbing to distractions. I was thinking, “what could possibly be distracting in an age before technology?” 😂
Thank you for this piece. I was invited to a small women’s group after church recently and despite my introvert brain resisting… I know developing in person relationships is more sustaining than staring at my phone & communicating from a distance, so I’ll try it out.